Too Far Fetched?

Mirelly · Oct 1, 2004

Too Far Fetched?

I'll tell her when I think that she's ready for it (unless she finds out before) ... but what follows (below) is a copy and paste direct from a blog that I am fond of ... it is sooo like a Sim's life that I thought I would share it ....

After a long day of going and doing, digging in dirt or playing pickup games of baseball in the street (we live in a small town -- this is actually possible), we eat dinner. About a half hour later, the baths begin. Everyone gets changed into fresh pajamas and their hair combed in neat parts. A light snack with milk is distributed, teeth are brushed, and everyone trots off to bed (though the oldest child is allowed to read for a half hour longer because he's 11). Then it's lights out and the house is quiet.

Theoretically, we could advance the hypothesis that my children are now in bed for the night and will sleep soundly until dawn.

This is not so.
During the night we move around more than a family under the Federal Witness Protection Program.

I just spent most of the night going back and forth between their rooms like a harassed valet. What I need is not a maid or even a nanny; I need a parking lot attendant who doesn't mind the long hours and the difficult temperaments of my charges. A '74 Chevy Nova wouldn't be as difficult to budge in a rainstorm as one of my children are in the middle of the night.

Don't believe me? This was my log from last night.

1 a.m. Middle child walks in bedroom announcing he can no longer breathe through stuffy nose. I put him back to bed and provide Kleenex. It is apparent he is very congested. I go downstairs and find the Vicks VapoRub in the medicine cabinet, which takes a significant amount of time as it is a small container hidden among a jumble of Benadryl bottles, Pepto-Bismol, prescription medicines, and a box of melted anti-nausea suppositories that someone forgot to put back in the refrigerator as directed (probably me).

1:15 a.m. I slather the child with Vicks VapoRub, which both of us detest because it has that elderly, pneumatic smell that I involuntarily associate with the grippe.

1:20 a.m. As child lies there gasping and complaining that the shirt he is wearing now feels cold and sticky, I remember that somewhere upstairs in a closet there is a Vicks Vaporizer. I dig through jumbles of discarded shoes and towels too ratty for regular use and find it. I dust it off and fill 'er up.

1:30 a.m. The vaporizer is now filled and installed in the child's room. I go back to bed.

1:31 a.m. The youngest child, who has obviously been lying awake in his own room listening to me scurry around like a rat, heeds my footsteps into the master bedroom and crawls into bed after me because he is now wide awake and can't sleep.

1:40 a.m. The middle child comes back in the master bedroom to tell me that he feels kind of thirsty. I send him back to bed, order the youngest child to stay put (he is sitting up and clapping his hands to see someone else is joining the party) and go back downstairs for a fresh cup of water.

1:42 a.m. I give the middle child his water. I cover the youngest child with blankets because he has kicked them all off. I close my eyes and feign unconsciousness.

2:05 a.m. The oldest child gets up to go to the bathroom across the hall. Even if it is 2 a.m., he must close the door behind him definitively. When he is finished, he dutifully turns off the light, which had been on to reassure his little brothers.

2:07 a.m. Middle child comes crying into the bedroom because the house has gone dark and he can't see and he's scared.

2:08 a.m. Bathroom light is turned back on. Middle child is escorted firmly back to his own bed and shown his own personal nightlight, which is glowing dimly on the nightstand. Child points out the light has been fading, and I acknowledge it probably needs new batteries, but I'm not changing them now.

2:30 a.m. Youngest child , who is still not asleep, is playing patty-cake in the dark and tugging on my hair in attempts to keep me awake and interactive. I have a small sotto voce breakdown while instructing child to be quiet and go to sleep.

3:10 a.m. The dog hears a stray cat on the porch and begins barking. Youngest child has gone to sleep, so I go downstairs and tell the dog to be quiet. I am too tired to go back up the stairs and fall asleep on the couch.

3:30 a.m. Youngest child rolls over and realizes I am absent, so gets out of bed and reconnoiters until locating me and attempts to turn on TV and entertain me. I turn off TV, take child back upstairs, and lie down again in own bed.

4:15 a.m. Middle child runs into room in panic claiming the house is haunted and he cannot sleep in his own room anymore. (This may be true, but that's another entry entirely). He is given a flashlight and assured his room is entirely safe and free of ghosts.

4:47 a.m. All three boys are soundly asleep. I, however, am wide awake.

Now I know why my mother had her children a minimum of five years apart. I used to joke that she only ovulated when one of us went to kindergarten, but I see now what she was on about. If you have children close together, forget about sleep. Forget about sanity. Forget about everything. You have to have all of your wits focused on keeping them occupied.
Everyone keeps telling me I'll look back on this someday and laugh.
No, I won't.

I'll be too busy sleeping.
Click to expand...

JoeOldfield · Oct 1, 2004

wow

i don't have kiddies, i'm barely an adult myself (24) but that lady must have patience of a saint and nerves of steal...

In reference to the sims i can never get mine into a sleep pattern, can it be done??

System_Zero · Oct 2, 2004

Sleep patterns aren't all that hard to set out, unless they get promoted and their new shift starts a few hours after they get promoted, in which case it takes a bit to develope a good sleep cycle.

Cyricc · Oct 2, 2004

Goodness, she must have an incredibly good temper, because everyone I know would likely have exploded in rage by the end of that...

Anyhow, about sleeping... going to community lots for more than a few hours can also wreak havoc with sleep patterns. With all the variable energy-level disruptors in a Sim's life, I have yet to get a Sim into a sleep pattern lasting more than 3 days... they're always sleeping at the most unrealistic times

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