I don't think I'll be getting sick of Laura anytime soon. At least, I hope not. I am going out of my way to make sure she survives the installation of Nightlife! Have I mentioned I'm finally getting it? Since I can only get one EP at the moment and I need to get the other for Christmas (going broke) I decided to get Nightlife first--there was a great deal on Circuitcity.com, $10 off! Yay! Oh yeah, then I think I might get the Holiday Pack...wow, I need a job.
I just read this again and wanted to say, nice job. (One small edit: it's "lay" not "lied" on her bed ... sorry, I'm an editor, can't help myself.) I'm really interested in this story. Her dream was very creepy, and the relationship between the two of them is sweet. As for titles, mine always tend to be a bit too long! No one's perfect, so don't worry about it. I like "Laura Bones."
Oh please Witch-gal. If you're an editor in the US please save the english-speaking world from white pigeons in swimming pools. A dove is a bird. The past tense of the verb to dive is dived. I dived, you dived, he dived, we dived, you all dived, they dived. No-one ever dove into anything. Because the verb is irregular. While I'm on the subject why do so many American's say 'herbs' as if they are talking about the game The Urbz ... it's not as if any other words with a gallic origin are pronounced with a definitive French slant. And anyway the whole lay(ed), laid, lied thing is deeply riven with controversy as is so much else in our fine language. Steinbeck used "would of" and Shakespear changed the spelling of a word from page to page and most erstwhile respected and respectable writers even made up their own words! Anyone for serendipity? 123 is completely 'book' in my estimation ... and that is a neologism I'd be interested to see someone over 30 explain!
Hehe - don't want to hijak the thread, (did you know I don't think I have ever done that? ) It's just the language thing reminded of this thing I saw on The Comic Side Of 7 Days about slang. See if you can guess what 'Sla-Me No Gitme!' means!
You're right, Mirelly, British and American grammar are two different beasts and never the twain shall meet. I'll say lay and you say lied, let's call the whole thing off. I'm a huge Eddie Izzard fan, by the way, and I do know herbs has a *9%!0 H in front of it. Doesn't mean I'll pronounce it that way. Over here, that's just plain wrong.
Yeah, if you say the H in herb around here, you get strange looks and a few giggles. I know, I've done it.
I really hate to nitpick, but I'm a speech-language therapist, and one of the things I work on with some of my students happens to be regular and irregular verbs. If you just add "ed" to make the verb past tense, it's a regular verb. If you have to change the spelling (ie run --> ran), it's an irregular verb. And I use dove as the past tense. In my language material books, dive is listed as an irregular verb. I checked Ask Jeeves, and it said "dove" is the correct form, but "dived" is becoming a literary form.
To be honest this argument can never be won. My apologies to Person123 for carelessly hijacking your excellent story ... which will continue after this short message ... click me
I'm long overdue on my compliment to you 123, but your story really is amazing, I'm very impressed with your skills at such a young age! Heaven knows I can't write that well now! You should think about trying to get something published.
Eh, well I can only do this one good because the plot is already all layed out for me! I tried writing a fantasy story once, but I hadn't even finished writing out a plotline and making up characters before I got sick of it.
I know the feeling. That's why I'll never get anything published. Writing is hard work and I get bored with plotlines and character development. I just want to follow where the characters lead and see what happens, willy nilly, with no idea how it will all end.
I, on the other hand, have high hopes of one day being published and am pursuing that dream ... my sims story gives me a chance to screw off, creatively. I don't have to worry too much about "head hopping" (switching point of view) or any of that other stuff. I'm just having fun with it. It's great to have instant audience feedback. It's not meant to be great literature, just fun. I also am having fun reading your stories. We have a creative bunch of people on this site.
I want to be a writer. I've been through God only knows amount of career ambitions. There was astronaut (!), lawyer, policewoman, actress (the main ambition), dancer, etc. I've settled on journalist. It feels write to me. (hehe! Sorry, really couldn't resist.) It's going to be hard. It's going to be difficult. But determined is my middle name. If - no, sorry - when I get my first book published, who wants a free copy? This is something I really want to do. I WILL do this!
LOL, what genre will you be writing? I guess I'm putting off finishing the next installment but I feel a little lazy...writers can have days (or weeks) off, right?
Writers can do what they want, when they want, honey! Well. Basically. Apart from deadlines and rent repayments. I think I'll go for Teen Fiction first of all. You know, the average teen with an average life. LOL. I think that's the easiest field to break into and establish your name.
The next morning Laura was awake bright and early, humming to herself cheerfully. She brushed her teeth, feeling quite refreshed despite how long theyd spent the last night talking andshe blushed and splashed cool water on her bright red face. She shouldnt be embarrassed anymore, right? She was an adult, she was going to get marriedshe was going to get married. She smiled to herself in satisfaction and went downstairs to fix herself some breakfast, throwing slices of bread into the toaster and cracking a couple of eggs over the pan on the stove. When Komei at last came down shed completely set the table with matching plates and silverware, and a small bouquet of wildflowers shed found outside. There were plates of toast, waffles, pancakes, and scrambled eggs. Wow. You outdid yourself today. I just feelgood. You ever feel that way? Whenever Im with you. He planted a kiss on her lips and sat down at the table, rubbing his hands together in anticipation. Laura sat down as well and took several pancakes, eggs, a waffle, and two pieces of toast. Hungry, are you? You wouldnt believe! She stuffed a forkful of eggs splattered with ketchup into her mouth. Komei glanced at her disdainfully as he cut a neat piece of pancake and put it into his mouth, chewing daintily. Laura snorted. Wimp. You know what, after we eat, lets go to Charlottes house. I know Ive been holding off on it, but now that were engaged I can rub it into her face. Besides, we missed Jennys birthday last week. Shes three now. His eyes shined with pride and Laura smiled softly. Even though, at first, Komei had been totally and completely against even acknowledging he had a daughter, hed begun to think of Jenny as only his daughter, not Charlottes. Alright, Ive got to go change now. Laura stood up and put her dish in the sink before going up the stairs. She donned a red cardigan sweater and jeans and applied some eyeliner and lip gloss. When she came back down, Komei smiled appreciatively and opened the front door, saying, You could beat her in a beauty pageant any day. Laura blushed but said, Sure, if I wore 50 lb. of makeup and got a boob job. You wouldnt believe how shallow those judges are. In college one of my friends entered one... They continued to chatter amiably on the way to Graderon and suddenly it hit Laura. Wait, what was her last name again? Charlottes? Duvonte. Laura snapped her fingers. She used to work in my dads company! It was Charlotte! She made the mistake with the printing press! Shes...shes why my parents are in a mental hospital right now. Shes why my life was completely shattered when I was sixteen... Her eyes welled with water as she realized all of the things that were the fault of this woman. I cant believe it. The woman that ended my life as I knew it is the mother of your daughter and lives twenty miles away from me. I couldve driven over there any time and... She stopped, unable to continue, sobbing quietly into her hands. Komei quickly pulled over onto the side of the highway and gently pulled Laura into his arms. Shh, its okay. Just let it all out. I hate her. I hate her. Lauras voice shook with fury. I just...I just cant believe it. Its pretty ironic, if you think about it. Shed stopped crying now. Even though your hate is completely justifiable, you definitely cant lose your temper when we get there. She doesnt know who you are. He kissed her hair softly and released her, turning on the car again. Laura nodded mutely. I definitely cant hate Jennifer for this. Shes totally innocent. However, when they got there, an entirely different sight than theyd expected greeted her. A woman Laura assumed to be Charlotte appeared at the door with black clothes on, her hair ragged and streaming eyes. Charlotte! What happened? Komei immediately rushed inside, pulling Laura along with him. He gently guided Charlotte to a couch just inside the door and sat down as well on the couch opposite it. Did someonedid someone pass away? Yes, she whispered, her voice raspy. Jenny. Jenny died. Komei looked shocked. What? WhaJenny? Our daughter, Jenny? Yes. She died last Sunday, the day after her birthday. She showed symptoms of the pneumonia, so I took her to the doctor. He said it was a mild case, but just wanted to keep her overnight since she was pretty youngand she died. Jennydied? Shes dead? Shes dead. Yeahshes dead. Komei reached out his hand and Laura took it, gently massaging his fingers. My daughter is dead. Dont keep saying it! Show some emotion, cry or something! It was the first time Charlotte had raised her voice. Its not like itll ruin your manly image or something! And who the ****(eh, dont like substitutes like sims, so I decided to just censor it in) are you? She whipped around to face Laura, her face red. Komeis little girlfriend? ImIm his fiance. The other woman looked almost hysterical now. Oh, I see! You brought her over to rub it in my face, huh? To make me realize that Im going to die alone, without my sweet little Jenny? Laura was horrified. No, wewe didnt know You little *****! How dare you?! She lunged forward to grab Laura but she quickly moved out of the way. Charlotte, youre not well! Sit down! The woman had stopped now and simply burst into tears, falling onto the couch. Youre rightIm not okay. I justI dont want to believe it. My darling Jennygone. She looked at Laura normally now and smiled weakly. Im sorry we met that way. Im justshaken, is all. Whats your name? Laura Bones. I completely understand. Ive lost loved ones before. Charlotte nodded. Alright. I know it sounds a little rude, but I need torest a little. Deal with it, you know? Could youleave? She smiled apologetically. I understand. Come on, Komei. She grasped his arm and led him out the door. Are you alright? II think I want to go homeyour place. Alright. Why dont I drive? Laura got into the drivers seat and waited for Komei to buckle his seatbelt before starting the car and pulling out of the driveway. Mods, if you have a problem, feel free to change any of the *'s. Anyway, yes, finally got it finished! Jenny got taken away by the social worker. So I just decided to pretend she died--good twist, right? I hadn't played with her enough to get attached anyway, so it's okay.
